You found the secret treehouse! Huzzah!
I'd give you a gold star, but no one's cared about earning those since kindergarten.
What can you do with a stupid little sticker anyway? Use it to get out of a traffic ticket? “Yes officer, I was speeding because I’m really good at finding things and I was searching for the best bagel in Atlanta. See? I have a gold sticker to prove it and all.”
…Actually I should try that. It can’t hurt.
And in case you were wondering, the best bagel in Atlanta is Goldberg’s pumpernickel rye with chive cream cheese.
Here in the Secret Treehouse, from time to time I'll post updates on new programs and offerings I'm working on.
No, this page doesn’t come with a Goldberg’s bagel. Sorry I brought it up. Damn it, now I’m hungry! Who wants to go to Goldberg’s?
Enrollment opens once a year. The course is go at your own pace, and we’ll have weekly calls with the group to ask questions and so you receive more detailed guidance from me.
Areas covered include: nutritional counseling, exercise guidelines, and movement therapy specifically designed for you. We’ll tackle things like sleep, how to fill your house with shortcuts to keep you from getting sick instead of being a primary color-laden junk food pit, and even how to stop your kids’ whining about having to eat something green that isn’t a pickle (hint: it’s easier than you think).
You’ll also get free access to my live fitness classes for the length of the program, weekly group calls, and a warm fuzzy sense of community. It’s like a hug, but virtually. Because COVID.
Afraid you’ll burn down the house every time you walk into the kitchen?
True story, that nearly happened to me the first time I ever tried to cook something at the ripe old age of 11. I was scrubbing the smoke stains off the walls for weeks!
You’ll learn basic cooking skills (that don’t involve making a certain blue box of mac ‘n cheese which shall remain nameless) and be able to read any recipe as if it was actually written in English! (heads up: most recipes in the US are written in English).
If you can relate, this course is for you.
*cool puffy white chef’s hat that makes you feel all fancy not included